“From now until further notice, you’re no longer allowed to tell me how YOU feel.” A gentle and wonderful woman (and friend) told me he said to her.
The words were never said to me verbatim…but their substance was. I know how it feels to be seen as “less than” through the eyes of a man you think you love, you live with, you dream of a future with.
I told her what I had learned what feels like long ago but only hours sometimes “now, you must write how you feel.”
Today I realized that when I began writing again, after years of abuse and – that why I write and why so often it’s so personal is – I know what it feels like not be seen. But it’s more than me simply wanting to write how I feel now. I want the possibility for you, dear one to feel seen.
This is not to say I want you, dear reader to see me. What I want, what I strive to do is say “I see you.”
I hope at some point along the way I do that for you. That’s what my favorite writers do for me.
And until then I won’t stop trying.